For our birthdays (mine and my moms are 2 weeks apart) my mom wanted us to have our cards read. I have zero desire for this, and while I’m not an active unbeliever, I don’t put any faith in it either. It is JUST for entertainment purposes only. And I’ve never had it done before. Curiosity.
Now, like I said, I’m a psychic agnostic, but because he was old and gay, I just believed him more. You know? Old queens just know shit! They have seen it all. So this boosted my confidence up.
We sat in on one anothers, so my mom was my audience.
Now, right before our appointment we went for coffee and we chatted about the past two years, as I had to write out some information for someone who is sending out an introduction/blurb about me before a talk I am giving at their AGM. While writing out the things I participated in, I sound super exciting and I ended up feeling a little pompous about it. (And I hate that, I do NOT sell myself well, which is why I have amazing life experiences and a super shitty job. Seriously, people should really want to hire me. I’m just not good at expressing how awesome I am in interviews and networking functions. Anyways…back to me being humble.) So my mom specifically says…your life has been amazing and different the past 2 years!
(Note: He actually records the session on a cassette, I unfortuneately do not own anything that plays a cassette. I may at some point do a transcript of it, if I find something at my moms that will allow me to do so. I would love to post it. So this is just from memory and all paraphrasing. But you can be sure there was lots of super gay finger snapping and neck weaving. Which I love.
So I went first and as I shuffled my cards I was thinking of the questions I wanted answered. And they were something like:
- Will I be lucky enough to die young?
- How many marriages will I have, the answer will be 0 or more than 1.
- Will I always be poor?
Aside from the marriage thing, which I didn’t dwell on too much, I swear I wasn’t thinking about relationships. But he literally talked about relationships for 20 minutes.
So as soon as he lays out the cards he says
The past two years have been busy and you’re ornery and just want to get things done, and your restless. But since the summer time the ball has started rolling and your only gaining more momentum. The past 2 years have been a struggle and reawakening. But you’ve finished that, (which is great because some people it takes their whole lives). – I ended my 2 year relationship, registered for my final seminar, applied to go to Iraq, and quit a shitty job that I had worked at for so long!
You have found like minded people the past 2 years who are gathering around you, and they support and share your same goals. (At this point in my head I laughed and thought “I wonder if he is talking about all the Mennonites I know now.) And then immediately afterwards he says…they’re like your knew “flock”. I was like. Holy fuck! He used the word FLOCK? He IS talking about my Mennonites!
He also said I was not one to suffer fools, and I have a knack for not holding onto relationships that don’t need to be help onto. However, the past relationship, he will probably always be a dear friend, but I am no longer attached and affected by that person anymore. He is broken and romantically tragic.
I tend to be attracted to broken people however. (I already knew this. Lol)
I love optimists, but I am willing to do the dirty work that needs to be done to get there. He sees me as a “digging latrines and bloody hands wrapping wounds” kind of person, because the word is full of shit and blood. But you know that and you aren’t afraid of it.
I think lots of people would find this insulting. I loved it.
He also said he saw me living in the east, I started to worry that he meant Toronto, or Nefoundland…and then he said the “eastern hemisphere”….thank Jesus. Pakistan and Afghanistan trump Toronto or St.John’s any day of the week!
He sees lot’s of kids in my future…but not like my babies. He made it sound like a teacher-y type thing. Although I have a feeling if things don’t work out…it might have meant cats.
My moms was really boring, the only thing I remember from the end was that she asked if there was going to be any “big events” in the near future and he mentioned a wedding for a young couple (true dat), but no funeral, and no losses. So I guess I’m not dying in Afghanistan!